Today the Internet collectively ejaculated.
Unfortunately I don't think I'm too far off the mark when I say that. You see today was the day that scores of men (and I'm sure some women) have dreamed of. We all finally got to see what Jennifer Lawrence looked like naked.
If you haven't heard (and you will soon) a range of celebrities have had their privacy violated and naked pictures have been posted onto the Internet. Like those men and women I reacted with glee when I learnt about these pictures. They popped up on Reddit and suddenly my mouth was agape.
Was it her?
Could it be faked?
No. Picture after picture was posted showing Lawrence and others in clearly intimate moments (I did not see any of the star mid-coitus and have no plans to look) meant only for their partner. As the day wore on and I got down to my normal day of work I kept seeing news article after news article posted about the incident.
I also saw my friends posting about the leaked pictures. It gave me an understanding that I had not thought of when I saw the original pictures. I like to surround myself with educated people and the women whom I call friends are no exception. These women are at the forefront of the Australian progressive movement and so we often see eye-to-eye over civil rights, refugee rights and the role of women in society. Because of this I trust them implicitly and take everything they say to heart. At times I may not agree with it (see: Israel/Gaza) but I know that it comes from a place of well intention and that they have studied the situation from all sides.
Their tweets began to talk about an invasion of privacy, the lewd nature of men on the Internet and the hypocrisy surrounding these photos. How could we claim to be all for Internet privacy and yet go absolutely ape-shit over naked pictures of celebrities? How would we feel if our private photos were stolen and plastered online? Why should there be rejoicing at this?
From this I performed a small but vital piece of mental gymnastics.
How would I feel if my nudes were leaked? Have I ever sent nude pictures over the internet? Yes. Of course I have. In moments of intense passion, desire or lightheadedness I have of course sent photographs of myself naked to other people. Some of them have my face in them. Even if I had posed naked for artists (I have) those photos are of a completely different nature. These photos are taken for an audience of one, not of one million, but today they are seen by all the world.
As my mind continued to make these leaps and bounds (that I now realise should have been done before) I felt an incredible amount of shame and disgust. As the day wore on I saw these less and less as pictures of a woman whom I had fantasised and desired for years and saw them as what they truly were: abuse.
If I came across a video or a picture of a woman being raped or of a child being sexually molested I would not only feel sick to my stomach I would immediately report it to the police. One time I did unfortunately come across child pornography on Twitter. It disgusted me to no ends and I honestly still feel uneasy about the seedier sides of the Internet since that day.
So why did I not do the same thing when I saw those photos of Jennifer Lawrence?
Because she was an actress and with that comes increased media coverage, speculation and (in truth) I thought that I owned that little bit of her. Now these were not the things that came to my mind when I saw the pictures...they were what I thought afterwards, what I thought when I had returned to my senses. It's a disgusting realisation for one to have: that you have turned into the thing you have always claimed to hate.
To Jennifer Lawrence and everyone else who have had their phones hacked, their privacy invaded and their lives shattered...I am sorry. I am truly, truly sorry.
No I did not post those pictures. I committed no illegal act. I will never see the inside of a jail cell for what I have done. But I have perpetuated the abuse that you are suffering right now. Please, forgive me one day.
No comments:
Post a Comment